Ruthie Delk graciously filled in for us for this week - thanks so much Ruthie!!

I can’t believe that I am the one that ends up reviewing the chapter from SWSH on Sexuality: The Heart’s Unsuspecting Mirror. How did this happen!! I want to say right off the bat that I think this book is amazing and EVERY woman should read it. I’ve never read a book that quite captures the struggles that women deal with in such an authentic way. And this chapter is no different. She tackles the issues surrounding physical intimacy between a husband and a wife in a truly insightful way. For instance, have you ever thought of your physical relationship with your husband as worship? Have you ever thought of it as being celebrated in heaven? Have you ever thought of your attitude about it as being a true reflection of what’s going on in your heart and in your own relationship with God? Startling questions. The answers are even more startling. But the bottom line is this:

“Physical intimacy, set in its true context, takes us straight to the heart of God, because the necessary components of trust and faithfulness and passion, belong first and foremost to him. Sex is a drama that mirrors the sacrificial love of God-a spiritual reality so beautiful, so profound, it will take the whole of our lives to comprehend….for now we have an experience that bonds us for life-body and soul- with the heart of another human being…we have a place of shelter, healing, passion and dare I say it , grace.”

I can honestly say that I’ve never really thought about it that way, have you? She does a great job of laying a biblical foundation for understanding the purpose of sex and helps us redefine our perspective along these lines-instead of our culture’s view. She also explains how men and women are different (duh!) but in a way I had never really heard before. As women we tend to compartmentalize our world and the various roles we play. I may not feel like I’m doing a great job as a wife, but I can look at my parenting, or work, or role as friend, daughter etc and feel like I’m doing okay in those spheres. But for a man, his world and roles are connected. If he is failing at work he feels like he’s failing everywhere. So it makes sense that if his level of intimacy with his wife is not satisfying then he feels like a failure everywhere else. “From a man’s point of view the absence of an intimate physical connection with his wife, one he can confidently count on, injects the most toxic of emotions into their relationship.” Isn’t it ironic, that we want to be loved unconditionally, but see nothing wrong with making them “earn” what really should be a gift.

As you think about this..
1. What in your life has distorted your view of your sexuality? What lies would you have to stop believing in order to line your thoughts up with what the bible teaches?
2. If you’re married, what changes do you need to make in your attitude toward this specific aspect of marriage?
3. If you are single, how can you keep your heart open and express your sexuality in good and rich ways that honor biblical standards and not the culture’s.

What is it? How does it look? Does it change as you get older? Is it a constant striving? A continual development? Does it last? How much can you really be in community with someone, when life takes and pulls in so many different directions?

This striving, this longing, I am finding very wearisome. Very disheartening.

I did a Book Study a few years back on “Bravehearts” by Sharon Hersh. Here is the description on the back:

Within every woman is the desire for extraordinary relationships. We crave intimacy and interconnectedness, companionship, and camaraderie. Yet most of us begin to wonder if we want too much. As heartbreak and disappointment take their toll, we become convinced that our desire for deep connection is our downfall. Not understanding that a woman’s longings are her strength, we bury or ignore this God-given compass and lose our way. Yet the desire to connect persists. We make cookies for a new family in the neighborhood, send a note of encouragement to someone at church, plan date nights with our spouse, call a friend after a bad day at work to tell her every detail because we know she cares.
And still we long for more.

I like how she says interconnectedness, companionship, and camaraderie. Lately I have taken an interest in the thought of integrated relationships (where you have more than one connection with a friend in the things you are involved in). And yet I wonder if that is really possible. I have experienced it some in my life at times. In fact, 3 of those people that come to mind have all moved away in the past four years. These were people that cared for me, understood me, “got me”, and we had connections in life at different aspects.

I think, in a way, I am grieving that today as I write this. I am sad that life gets so busy and doesn’t leave room for friendships of this caliber much. It disheartens me that our lives are so spread out, so disconnected from one another. It makes me disappointed to see how selfishness and self-reliance keeps us from really being interconnected in one another’s lives.

So, I ask you…what do you think? Do you think it is possible? Have you experienced friendship like this or are you now? And what do you think are the barriers?

This weeks “Woman of the Week” on Z88.3 is our very own Susan Enlow!  She was nominated by her daughter, Allison Darnell.  You can read what Allison wrote about her by going to this link.  Congratulations, Susan!  You deserve it!

Corn season is almost upon us, and I’m excited. And so does Patricia Williams: “I love sweet corn and the Lime-Chive butter is what makes this side dish delicious. It’s adds pizzazz to regular corn on the cob. If you can’t find or don’t have sea salt you can use kosher salt found in any grocery store. As for the Hungarian paprika, it is different from regular paprika but if you don’t have it then use what you have.”

Corn on the Cob with Lime-Chive Butter submitted by Patricia Williams
Bon Appétit, August 2005

Lime juice, sea salt, and chives come together in a bright-tasting butter for sweet summer corn.

Easy Serving: Place the seasoned butter in large sealable container. Add hot drained corn. Seal container and shake until butter melts and coats corn. Transfer buttered corn to bowl.

Makes 8 servings.

Ingredients
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, room temperature
1/3 cup finely chopped fresh chives
2 teaspoons fresh lime juice
1 teaspoon finely grated lime peel
1/2 teaspoon fine sea salt
1/4 teaspoon Hungarian sweet paprika
Pinch of cayenne pepper
Sugar (optional)
8 ears of corn

Preparation
Mix first 7 ingredients in medium bowl. (Can be made 2 days ahead. Cover and chill. Bring to room temperature before using.)

To boil corn: Bring large pot of water to boil; add pinch of sugar, if desired. Husk corn. Add corn to pot. Return water to boil and cook corn 4 minutes. Drain corn and serve immediately with lime-chive butter.

To grill corn: Prepare barbecue (medium-high heat). Remove all but the innermost husks from corn. Fold back inner husks and remove corn silk. Rewrap inner husks around corn. Grill until husks are slightly charred and corn is tender, turning often, about 10 minutes. Serve immediately with lime-chive butter.

The following is a prayer that was posted on Sarah Delk’s blog, a middle school girl in our youth group, TNL.  I was so moved by openness and passion in it, that I wanted to share it with you all.  I never cease to be amazed by the youth of our church, and here’s a great example of why.  It’s so easy to think of teenagers, especially middle schoolers, as just being kids, with no spiritual insights.  But then I stumble across something like this prayer that reminds me that maybe there’s things I can learn from them.  Thanks Sarah, for sharing this with us, and for letting me post it on here.

Dear Lord:

“I want to be one with you. I want to be wholly and completely grounded in you. I want you to take me and re-mold and reshape me until I am exactly how you want me to be, perfectly fit to complete your will for my life. I want you to flow through my veins, burn through my bones and overflow into my life. I want you to effect the way I act, the way I talk, and the way I see things. I want the things that make you cry to make me cry. I want to have so much of your heart that I can even hear it beat! I want to know your passions and learn the sight of hopelessness. I want you to be part of me. No. I want to you to be all of me. Just you, nothing else. All of you, none of me. “